I know that feeling.
The tight pain in your chest, your palms are sweaty and the only words you can hear ringing in your head are “YOU can’t do this.”
I know that feeling.
Straight after obtaining my drivers license in 2018, I stopped driving. It scared me and I hated the feeling of being on the road in a car by myself. So I just didn’t drive and I constantly made excuses to drive our family cars. “that car is too big” and “that car is too fast.”
So when I was hired for my job in 2020 I knew I had to start driving but I had been out of practice for two years and all I had was anxiety bottling up. My dad and I would drive to my office and he would then drive my car home and the same process would take place in the afternoons.
But my anxiety wouldn’t leave me, I’d wake up in the mornings hyper-ventilating with tears in my eyes. The trucks and taxis petrified me and I hated being among all the other cars on the road.
So How Did I Conquer My Fear?
With a whole lot of faith and a little bit of mindfulness. Mindfulness is a “meditation technique in which you focus your awareness on the present moment by acknowledging, but not analysing or acting on, your feelings, thoughts and bodily sensations. ”
The second I started to feel uneasy I started to regulate my breathing, I closed my eyes and I held my car keys in my hands. Breathe in and breathe out. Nice and slow and then I let myself feel every emotion – still controlling my breathing. And as negative emotions engulfed me, I spoke positive affirmations over my life.
- I can do all thing through Christ who strengthens me
- If He is for me who or what can be against me
- I am a child of a great and mighty God
I’d pray for safe travelling mercies and peace as I turned my keys into the ignition. I then blasted my favourite worship music and belted the lyrics at the top of my lungs. I celebrated each safe trip to work like it was a win and I carried on to do that until driving started to become normal.
It took me months to get here. But if you take it day by day and believe that you’ll get through it. I promise you, you will. I know it isn’t easy but take it as it comes and try to surround yourself with as many positive people as possible. I’m so grateful to my family, friends and my work team for the constant support during that time in my life.
I know that this unprecedented time has brought a lot of doubt and fear and I want you to know that no matter what it is you’ll get through it.